Four years ago, I was sitting on my bed with tears in my eyes.

My marriage was falling apart, and one sentence my wife had said kept playing in my mind:

“I feel unsafe with you. Why can’t you just be there for me?”

I couldn’t understand it. How could she feel unsafe with me? It took me years to recognise something painful: I had never truly listened to her.

I listened to reply.

To explain myself.

To defend myself.

To help.

To fix.

But not really to understand.

So I started practising. With my wife, my friends, my children and anyone else who would let me. Slowly, something changed.

Eventually, my wife told me:

“I don’t know what you did, but something really changed. After so long, I look forward to coming home to you again.”

We still have our ups and downs. But that experience became one of the reasons this workshop exists.